The Official Blog of the FLIP Formula
Shift perspective by fueling life with gratitude, not gratification. 
Imagine being the pebble in the pond of mankind, causing a ripple effect of good, simply by flipping individual moments of frustration, in to individual moments of elation. Such an act is possible by exclusively activating gratitude in the midst of one’s frustration in the very instant the frustration arises.

As a human family we tend to unconsciously desire the gratification that comes from seeking communal commiseration, collectively complaining about the world, the weather, and the workings of our daily life; but a life fueled by something different, is a life that has a profound effect on all other lives it touches.

There is a powerful technique to take frustration, the very moment it appears, and in less then 30 seconds to isolate, investigate, and initiate a brand new sequence of thought that changes the trajectory of that moment and ultimately that life. The very process of flipping frustration in to wonder, triggers a powerful chemical release in the human mind that over time rewires the brain to permanently shift a person’s perspective of life and the world around them. That shift in perspective creates a missionary’s zeal to step in to a brave new world, fueled by possibility that change can happen, that it will happen, and that it happens one person at a time, one thought at a time, one flip of a frustration at a time.

The unconventional idea that gratitude inside of frustration, fuels life more powerfully than personal and selfish gratification ever can, is an idea that creates a movement of change in all that it touches. Flipping the gratitude switch changes perspective, changes relationships, and changes lives."
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Who Am I?

My name is Kevin Clayson, but I'm also known as the Chief Officer of Awesome. 

I'm the author of the book FLIP the Gratitude Switch, the creator of the FLIP Formula, and a motivational/inspirational speaker when I'm fortunate enough to be invited to speak for schools, businesses, corporations, and associations. The most important thing you need to know about me is that I'm a happily married man with three amazing children. I've committed my life to my family, my God, and to sharing the message of FLIP the Gratitude Switch, in hopes of playing some small part in making this world a better place.

 A Lack of Humility Creates A Lack of Humanity... Confucius Say "Gratitude will squash ego like bug." 
I had an experience today that reminded me of one of my favorite things about gratitude. I share this exact point in my course and my talk… here it is:
“A lack of HUMILITY creates a lack of HUMANITY… Gratitude is the greatest way to silence the ego.”
Let me elaborate a little. Some folks have built their wealth or success primarily on the basis of “what can I sell?” or “how much of my crap can I peddle?” and “what is the most amount of money I can convince or persuade someone to pay for whatever it is I’m selling?”
You will notice there is a tremendous lack of humanity, and caring, about the folks you are selling stuff to in that equation. Most of the people I know that approach business in this way create brief flashes of success and wealth, but then have to move on to the next thing, or reinvent themselves again and again. They are always focused on what they can get, how much they can make, what they can buy and show off. Each time they start something new, they will make some dough, but it will fizzle, and then they have to start over.
These types of folks are also always more likely to tell you about their success, than quietly create more of it. There is a definite and distinct lack of humility in them, and almost an air of arrogance in that which they create. As they tell you about what they’ve done or achieved, they use phrases like, “I always get what I want… it’s my right, I’m owed it,” or something to that effect. They mask their vain utterances as inspirational rants to “help you get what you want, because you are owed it too.”
The folks that I know that have created long-term, successful, and sustainable businesses, are much different. They have reinvented themselves as well, but only after they failed. They try to create something great that will really make a difference, they fail, they get back up, dust themselves off, and try again with the same prevailing mindset of “people first and profits follow.” Eventually these folks will find that one or two things that allows them to provide the most value to the most people over an extended period of time, and will become long-term successful and TRULY wealthy, not just merely appear wealthy for a time while constantly proving to you how wealthy they must be.
This type of person will also describe their success but in a different way. They may open their mouth with a phrase like, “You know WE have been very fortunate that people are really responding to our message (or product or whatever.)” It is not about them, they rarely use “I,” because it is all about others. This type of person acknowledges with constant gratitude, that none of it would be possible were it not for God, others, and the gifts they’ve recieved.
Let me describe these two types differently.
The person that is focused first on profits will dig a shallow hole, and if they can find a shallow source of water, they will sell that water for an exorbitant amount and tell their buyers that without THIS water, they will surely die of thirst. They will make money, realize the well is shallow, and have to pick up their pick and shovel again, and as soon as they see another drop of water, will start their exact same sales process all over again. It won’t matter if the water is a little dirty or even if it will potentially harm the person drinking it, because the only thing that matters is the money they can make from it RIGHT NOW. They will repeat this again and again and again, and constantly work, thinking only of the profit they can create temporarily to maintain the standard of living they want to appear to have, and who they have to convince to buy it.
The other person, the real business person who focuses first on people and then reaps longterm and sustainable profits, will start to dig a hole, and at the first drop of water discovered, will not sell it, or tell everyone about it and try to convince folks they need THAT water… instead they will keep digging. If it is a shallow well, they will move on, searching for the deep, pure and virtually infinite well. Once they find that well, they will test the water and make sure it is pure and good for the folks who will buy it. They will set up a distribution mechanism, and figure out a way to deliver that water in a way that benefits their customer, realizing the more good they do for their customer, the more wealthy they, as the owner of the well, can become.
So PLEASE, don’t get fooled by the hucksters who care only about selling you dirty water to support the standard of living they’ve grown accustomed to… seek out the givers that want to provide pure and tasty water, who understand that they more pure and tasty the product, and the better experience you have in investing in and consuming the water, the more good they are doing, and the more wealthy they will become.
As my friend, and author of The Go Giver, Bob Burg says, “real influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first, and your true worth is determined by how much more you give in value than you take in payment.”
So here is the take aways…
1. Cultivate gratitude in order to increase humility. That humility will banish the ego, and have you focus on what is most important… those you serve, not simply how to be self-serving while having the appearance of serving others.
2. Real value and influence, that is sustainable and creates lasting wealth is created as a bi-product of focusing first on others with an understanding that value is reciprocal… give as much as you can and be committed to caring about others FIRST, and wealth will follow.
3. It is all summed up in one of my favorite quotes in the world states, from the book Man’s Search For Meaning, Viktor Frankl says, “Don’t aim at success. The more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one’s personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one’s surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long-run—in the long-run, I say!—success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it.”
Be well my friends… God bless and remember to be thankful IN your current circumstances whatever they may be, and watch humility and goodness flood in to your life! #gratifuel
Insecurity Dressed Up As Confidence
Macklemore’s song Light Tunnels is awesome, and frankly says everything I’ve always kinda believed about celebrities and Hollywood. He describes what it’s like to be at a big Hollywood-type awards show, in this case it’s the Grammy’s, and one of the things he shares is:

“So we Botox our skin and we smile for the camera

Might as well get a new nose while we’re at it

This is America and insecurity’s our fabric

And we wear it and we renamed it fashion”

He also uses the phrase “insecurity dressed up as confidence” a couple of times. I love all of that, and that someone is actually saying it.

As I speak to these kids, and I’m in and out of Middle Schools and High Schools, and as I volunteer my speaker services for this suicide prevention non-profit I work with, and go speak to students associated with the non-profit, I’m always struck that massive insecurity is already setting in at their young ages. I mean I shouldn’t be surprised because it is the same insecurity that has plagued you and me since we were that same age. It just somehow feels wrong that it’s already plaguing THEM!!

I spend a good part of my talk sharing stories about all those times I felt like I would never “get the girl,” and how I never thought I’d be cool enough, and how sometimes I would walk down the halls and feel like no one really could see me. I help them realize that we ALL feel this way, but all of our media tells us we aren’t “them” so then we might as well be insecure about ourselves.

So who do I mean by “them?”

I share in the book that the idea of reality tv, and this perceived reality that is nothing more than scripted nonsense, has had a profound impact on our happiness levels as a people. We are always comparing ourselves… we aren’t as pretty or good looking, we aren’t as rich, we don’t have those cars, “they have zero talent, how can they make so much money… I bet they’ve never worked a real day’s work in their life.” None of which is true about us or about them.

Recently a man who I had shared the stage with committed suicide. He was the picture of perfect success. Gorgeous and surgically altered wife, glowing white teeth, fit, nice suits, mansions, money, success, and he would share it all from the stage in an attempt to help other people feel like they could achieve the same level of success. My heart cries for his wife and children… but where did it all go wrong?

Apparently it was “insecurity dressed up as confidence” just like Macklemore said.

What about the recent display of outright crazy from America’s real first family :), the Kardashians. Bruce isn’t Bruce, Kanye is 150 million in debt and begging Mark Zuckerberg for a 1 billion dollar loan (by the way Yeezy, if you are gonna blow up the Zuck for some cash… maybe use the social networking platform he invented and actually runs, not another one. Oh another reason to use the FB, is because all your rant and insecurity laden pompousness could have been articulated in one post, cuz uh, you get more than 140 characters on the “Book of Faces”… just a little free advice there Kanye.)

All of that crap is literally just “insecurity dressed up as confidence!”

This is why I have found gratitude to be so important. I’m sure I will always have some internal sense of insecurity that I deal with, but I don’t let it plague me, and define my day any longer.

I used to constantly compare my level of success and achievement with those around me… like a perpetual “urination” contest (keepin’ it PG folks). All of that kind of stopped when I started really using FLIPping the Gratitude Switch with it.

“I don’t care what your house looks like and how many square feet it is, I’m just thankful I have a roof over my head.”

Switch FLIPped!

“I don’t care that you drive a tricked out Range Rover… I’m just thankful I have a beautiful new car, and my payment is only $260 a month. It still has Bluetooth and a touch screen and everything, and I feel pretty awesome about it.”

Switch FLIPped!

“I don’t care what your body looks like, I’m just thankful I still have two legs that are fully functional, that I can take to a treadmill and go put in the work to lose weight.”

Switch FLIPped!

“I don’t care that you have millions or billions more than me… I’m just thankful I have enough, and can spend as much time as I want with my kids and family, and go to Disneyland every now and then, and give to my Church. I feel blessed beyond measure.”

Switch FLIPped!

There are so many more examples, but these are some of the biggest that I have seen take root for me.

You don’t have to compare you to others… you only have to compare you to YOU!!!

I have folks that compare themselves to ME… first of all that’s CRAZY, and secondly… that’s CRAZY!!! Don’t compare yourself to me, or anyone but yourself, and the knowledge you have of who you can become and what you are becoming. Then just be THANKFUL that you are who you are this moment.

You may not have achieved the level of success you want yet, but look at is as if you are actively on the road to that success, and every step you take is a step of progress that brought you closer to where you want to be… focus on the gratitude for the tiny bit of progress made, not the deficit of desired achievement you believe is present.

You may not be a perfect parent yet, but dwell on and be thankful for the little wins… you know when your child actually DOES listen, when they simply and beautifully tell you they love you of their own free will and choice. Focus on those little victories, and be thankful that somehow, some way, you’ve done something right to create that little moment. Then realize that you are on the path to doing even more.

I feel like insecurity largely stems from the perception of lack, but if we are just thankful for what we have then there is no lack. If there is no perception of lack, then there is no reason to be insecure.

Most of the pillars of success, fame, beauty, etc, that we use as the measuring stick of our own is nothing more than what Macklemore says… “insecurity dressed up as confidence.”

You can use gratitude to navigate insecurity… be thankful for who you are, what you have, what you have become right now in THIS moment. This, YOU, is more than it has been, you are better than you have been in the past… fix your mind upon that which is awesome about you, and it will make it even to accomplish the next bit of success and fulfillment you seek.

For those that want to hear the song… here you go, but WARNING… I don’t think this is the clean version:
A Quick FLIP Of The Gratitude Switch 2-21
Smile. Did you feel how easy that was. Now go smile at someone else. Did you know that simple flicker of movement can infuse something in to this world that nearly 2/3 of people are missing… Happiness. With that little smile you just did your part to make this world a better place today. Feel thankful that your body is so expertly assembled that with a little firing of a few muscles you can turn someone’s bad day in to a good one. ‪#‎DailyFlip‬ ‪#‎gratifuel
About Me

My name is Kevin Clayson, but I'm also known as the Chief Officer of Awesome. 

I'm the author of the book FLIP the Gratitude Switch, the creator of the FLIP Formula, and a motivational/inspirational speaker when I'm fortunate enough to be invited to speak for schools, businesses, corporations, and associations. The most important thing you need to know about me is that I'm a happily married man with three amazing children. I've committed my life to my family, my God, and to sharing the message of FLIP the Gratitude Switch, in hopes of playing some small part in making this world a better place.

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